New Manager Rule #8: The Perfect Handshake

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Manager with a great handshake

“A handshake is like a corporate Rorschach test – what they feel says more about you than what they see.”

Yes, I just quoted myself. When you write a blog, you get to do that. It’s one of the perks of authorship, along with carpal tunnel and an unhealthy attachment to your coffee pot.

But let’s break this down, shall we? A handshake is more than just a greeting; it’s a split-second personality test. In that brief moment of palm-to-palm contact, you’re not just saying hello – you’re making a statement about who you are as a leader. Are you firm and confident? Weak and uncertain? Or are you that guy who seems to be auditioning for a arm-wrestling tournament? Choose wisely, because in the corporate world, your handshake speaks volumes before you’ve uttered a single word.


Shake hands firmly.

Aim for confident professional, not “I’m crushing your metacarpals.” My dad used to pull them in and make it a two-handed shake, and he was Ford Motor Company’s Salesman of the year for 8 years, so what could go wrong?

Now, let me tell you about my father. Picture this: a man in a three-piece suit, gold chain dancing across his vest, pocket watch at the ready, and an Irish brogue so thick you could spread it on toast. This man was a handshaking virtuoso. He didn’t just shake hands; he conducted a symphony of palm-to-palm perfection.

His signature move was the two-handed shake. It was like he was saying, “I’m not just greeting you; I’m gifting you a tiny moment of my award-winning charm.” And let me tell you, it worked. Ford Motor Company doesn’t hand out “Salesman of the Year” awards for mediocre handshakes and lukewarm personalities.

But here’s the thing: you’re not selling cars in the 1980s (thank goodness, those lapels were a crime against fashion). You’re leading a team in the 21st century. So, let’s update Grandpa’s technique for the modern era.

First, the grip. You want firm, not bone-crushing. We’re aiming for “confident professional,” not “secret arm-wrestling champion.” Your handshake should say, “I’m competent and trustworthy,” not “I’m overcompensating for something.”

Duration is key. Too short, and it’s like you can’t wait to get away. Too long, and it gets weird. Aim for 2-3 seconds. It’s like a text message for your hands – get your message across quickly and move on.

The Two Handed Shake

Now, about that two-handed shake. Your grandpa was onto something big here. In the right situation, this move can be a game-changer. It’s like the secret sauce of handshakes, and when used correctly, it can create an instant connection.

The two-handed shake is perfect for those moments when you want to convey warmth, sincerity, and a deeper level of engagement. Use it when you’re:

1. Offering heartfelt congratulations

2. Expressing genuine gratitude

3. Meeting a highly respected individual

4. Reconnecting with an old friend or valued colleague

5. Sealing an important deal

When you employ the two-handed shake, you’re not just greeting someone; you’re creating a moment. It’s like you’re saying, “This interaction is special, and I want you to feel that.” It’s a powerful tool in your leadership arsenal. Just remember, with great power comes great responsibility. Use it wisely, and you’ll leave a lasting impression that would make Grandpa Noel proud.

Handshake and Eye Contact.

Eye contact during the handshake is crucial. Lock eyes like you’re trying to win a staring contest, but, you know, in a friendly way. It says, “I see you, I acknowledge you, and no, I’m not looking at the hair in their nose.”

And for the love of all that is holy in the business world, make sure your hands are dry. Nothing kills a first impression faster than a clammy handshake. It’s like greeting someone with a wet fish. Keep a handkerchief in your pocket if you need to. It’s not just an accessory; it’s hand-sweat insurance.

Here’s a Dad Pro Tip: Practice your handshake with a trusted friend or a very patient family member. Get feedback. If they start wearing protective gloves around you, you might be shaking too hard. If they ask if you’re feeling okay, you might need to firm it up. Find that Goldilocks zone – not too hard, not too soft, just right.

Let this sink in, a good handshake is like a good leader: firm, engaging, and leaves people feeling good about the interaction. Master this, and you’ll be well on your way to making first impressions that last. Who knows? Maybe one day you’ll be adding your own flair to it. Just maybe leave the pocket watch at home. We’re not quite ready for that level of retro cool… yet.

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Kevin B. Leigh
Co-Founder / Writer / Serial Growth Hacker Kevin Leigh co-founded Dealer Simplified, LLC, a company dedicated to simplifying automotive software. The goal of Dealer Simplified is to jump-start the profit centers in dealerships while keeping the processes and software simple and easy to understand and implement. Kevin is also an accomplished author and is passionate about writing and blogging. His latest novel, “Gollup the Woods” was inspired by the stories he heard from his father on their many trips through the Irish countryside. Kevin currently resides in Alden, New York with his wife Mary and their three boys. Leigh spends his spare time volunteering with various community organizations.

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